Thirtyday Purgeday: Purging my 20’s

{If I can find the confidence at 30 I had at 3, I think we’re all going to be alright.}

On my 20th Birthday Sara and I wandered around Wenceslas square in Prague, and she and Katie bought me this gorgeous Mucha necklace that can’t believe I’ve had for ten years.  {don’t worry, I’m not purging the necklace.}

That’s how this decade started for me.  I had no idea what it had in store.   When I started my 20’s, in June of 2001 the world was a different place.   I was studying abroad and traipsing around Europe with Sara, both of us a certifiable hair-color train wreck, but we didn’t care because that’s what being in college and stumbling drunk on absinthe out into the streets of Fucking Praha is all about.

Before I turned 21, the world would have changed dramatically. By the time I was 25, we’d be in a financial boom that led me to believe that golden rings didn’t need to be grasped so much as avoided as they plummeted from the sky ready to be gathered up by anyone who could snatch them fast enough.  By 28 I’d seen Hope prevail, a child grow inside me, and financial turmoil the likes of which I never imagined I would experience in my lifetime.

My twenties were full of growing pains and social anxiety.   They were also full of living “glamor-adjacent” (I have to credit my new friend Laura for that one) sushi dinners with movie stars, and limo rides to awards shows that weren’t meant for me, but holy fuck did I get to do some cool stuff.   They were also full of power ballads, mix CD’s, incredible BRILLIANT friends, and a little bit of me slipping in my own vomit.

In my 20’s I married the love of my life.   In my 20’s, I made Delilah George.

In my twenties I found my voice.

I met my mentor in my 20’s, and he insisted that I write.  Have I said thank you for that, Marcos?   Have I said how proud I am to have learned under your brilliant tutelage?

In my 20’s I learned that you can still email your three college room mates at two in the morning and get that same old stream of consciousness banter that kept the four of you together all those years…even as thirty creeps closer…only hours away.

I learned that sometimes friends and family aren’t the same thing. And sometimes they are.

I learned that love needs to be fought for and worked at and never, ever given up on.

I learned that life is a gift.

I learned what pain really was.

I learned what joy really was.

I started to get a small taste of what success might feel like.

I saw dreams die.   I saw friends die.   I saw spirits beaten.

But I also saw perseverance.   I learned to fight.   I learned that nothing is yours until you grab hold of it with both hands.

At the end of the day, I learned to put down my sword and part ways as friends.  No good comes from making another human being feel like shit.

And I learned that Field of Dreams taught me everything I needed to know when I was a wee child, and it took me thirty years to figure it out.

If you build it, he will come.”

So today, I’m not purging.  I’m just reorganizing.  I’m putting my life lessons in a bag, picking them up, and stepping into my 30’s ready to DO THIS SHIT.  Am I right?

Fuck, I hope I’m right.

Did you purge?

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