Dudes, seriously ~ can you see that? That red mark at the end of the arrow? Those are my child’s teeth marks on my face from where she sank her fangs into my flesh while laughing like a maniac. What started as a giggle fest on the kitchen floor, quickly a took a turn for the torturous as she clamped down on my unsuspecting face. Hard. Still giggling. And I was already laughing, so my screams of pain were lost in the shuffle. {At least, I’m going with that over my child laughing AT my screams of pain.}
I know you guys are probably thinking “that mark is tiny you wimp” but her whole mouth is tiny, so don’t let the size fool you ~ the girl has razor-like chompers. And it was one of the oddest experiences I’ve ever had, because while my brain was screaming “pain! GET IT OFF!” my mommy instincts were keeping me from flinging my tiny girl across the room. I totally don’t mean that as crazily as it sounds. I didn’t want to fling her across the room. I wanted to find a way to calmly remove her from my face before she drew blood, but with all her thrashing and maniacal laughing, that was not that easy of a feat, and my flight or fight reflex was going bonkers in the mean time. I had to use all of my restraint to keep from moving any faster than was safe for her while I gently pried open her jaw and slipped out from under her. It was a HARD CORE parenting moment, you guys. Hard core.
Seriously. Look at my nose. Delilah, you are totally grounded.
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