The Life And Death of Butt Pumpkin

He didn’t start out that way…rotten and deflated on the front stoop…

Butt Pumpkin began his professional life as a hefty but lopsided reject propped up against a hay stack in a Sherman Oaks pumpkin patch.

Less than half the price of the similarly sized pumpkins, I was initially drawn to him for his large, smooth carving surface, but when I rolled him over and revealed his backside I realized this pumpkin had a destiny to fulfill.

We emptied his insides and scraped him clean, that gourd with the crack in the back.

We modeled our best impressions of what we thought his face might look like. In the end, (pun intended) there was really only one way to go for a pumpkin with a butt.

(Nope, he’s not spelunking, that’s the headlamp Scott bought to read Delilah stories at bedtime.)

It was no easy task, bringing BP to life…

We sweated and chipped and carved, but I’d be lying if I said it wasn’t worth it.

So worth it.

Ahhhh, he was glorious. But a Pumpkin this great was never meant to last. His destiny fulfilled, he collapsed in a puddle of his own rot sometime late Halloween night.

Goodbye Butt Pumpkin.

[I had big plans to make you guys an animated GIF with him crying pumpkin tears and leaving a little tootsie roll in back, but as it turns out I’m not that good of a blogger. Plus he took a turn for the worst really quickly. I totally didn’t see it coming.]