OMFG. Ellen, I love you.


Every year, Ellen hosts a special Mother’s Day show for first time Moms.   (The pic above is from last year’s show, and that beautiful little girl just so happens to be Jett, my friend Cindy’s daughter.)   It’s like Oprah’s favorite things, but with awesome baby crap.   Well…this year, I’m a first time Mom, and when I heard that she was looking for women to populate her audience (and thus, reap the benefits of her incredible give-aways) I sent in our pregnancy story right away.   About an hour or two later, I got a call from a lovely girl named Jessica.   She asked me some questions about my pregnancy (and how the recession has affected me…blah blah blah) and then asked me if I’d like to be a guest in their audience on the Mother’s Day special.    At the time I was neck deep in the toilet bowl for most of the day, and Scott was recovering from his dog attack mishap, so this was really just about the best baby news I could have gotten.   So far, pregnancy had been pretty rough for me, and I was really looking for something to feel good about.

I had no idea what I was in for.   Cindy had warned me that it would be amazing, but I could never have grasped the insanity of what Ellen was about to do for us 1st time moms to be.

After a few hours of waiting, my Mom and I (who was my very special Mother’s Day guest) were finally escorted from the Gate 3 Parking Lot at WB (which would have been hot and sticky even if it weren’t filled with hormonal women ranging from 4-9 mos pregnant) into the air conditioned “Riff Raff Room.”   It was hilarious to see the endless line of bellies – seriously I haven’t seen more pregnant chicks in one place since the New Kids on the Block reunion tour.   (I’m not kidding…Staples center was FILLED with pregos that night.)   The bathroom in the audience waiting area hilariously contained a buffet of pregnancy snacks ranging from pickles to twinkies.   I was a little skeeved out by the idea of eating a pickle out of a jar that looked like it had spent the last 20 years on top of the bar at the Smokehouse, but I did help myself to a couple of strands of licorice and some gelt.   Finally, we were let in to the studio, where the “ready to pop” girls were filtered towards the front rows, and the rest of us were placed backwards from there.   (Then, I won the 4 mos pregnant portion of the pre-show dance contest and scored  a sweet T-shirt.   I had to dance on stage to do it, but at this point I was pretty pumped, and willing to do just about anything.)

Anyway – the giveaways were mind blowing.   It started with Ellen announcing that we’d all be getting brand new silent Frigidaire dishwashers (which was met by gasps from the audience) and it was just non-stop for the rest of the show.   Every five seconds Ellen would reveal another amazing gadget or baby goody that we’d all get to take home.   By the time she closed the show, our list of loot looked something like this:

Frigidaire Gallery Dishwasher

Butler Bag

Mrs. Meyer’s Clean Day Baby Line

Prince Lionheart Bottle Starter Kit

Graco imonitor mini

Ambajam Blanket

Baby Bjorn

Zooni Hat

Chloe in Style Baby Converse Booties

Onesies that say “I kicked it with Ellen”

6 month supply of Huggies diapers

Graco “Sarah” Crib

Serta Crib Mattress

Dwell Studio Crib Set

Dalla Nonna Calendar Necklace

Chicco carseat

Kodak EasyShare Digital Camera

$100 Shutterfly Gift Card

UppaBaby Vista Stroller

My head is still spinning.   Scott and I never imagined that we’d luck out in this way.   As I’m sure most people can imagine, 2009 is not the most financially stable year to be starting our family, but we’ll be damned if we’re going to let some greedy bankers stop us.   And thanks to Ellen, we’ll now be able to put a chunk of change in our baby’s college fund, rather than spending it on his/her first year of life.   Which is really quite an incredible gift.   I couldn’t be more grateful to have gotten to be a part of it.

Feed Me Seymour