Do you remember that movie? It stars Marge Simpson Julie Kavner as a struggling single mom who finds success as a stand-up comic, and ends up neglecting her children along the way . Well..it’s a good movie and you should rent it. {It’s also, an amazing reminder of life just-pre techono boom, and how different it really was.}
ANYWAY. My Dad loves this movie. Julie Kavner’s character has this catch phrase “It’s a life lesson” that she says when ever anything bad happens, from dropping a plate on a bathroom floor to when her angst-ridden teenage daughter (a young Samantha Mathis) gets…in trouble. I remember, the lights came up after the movie was over, and my dad was already kvelling with his new words to live by. And he was damn serious. He eventually approriated it as his own, and after he finished lecturing me for whatever absurd thing I was getting in constant trouble for as a teenager, he’d always come back to tell me he loved me, swing an arm around me, and offering me a [thickly brooklyn accented] “It’s a life lesson, right kid?”.
Well at this particular moment in my life…school is in session.
I think at some point, we all struggle with out transition from childhood to adulthood, and what that really truly means. I’ve been a financially independent “adult” for almost ten years, and yet I’m having more growing pains now than I’ve ever had in my life. Part of that is a ripple effect of my recovery process. Part of that is because I’ve never…EVER truly wanted to grow up and take the reigns. I wanted to be carefree and creative. Forever. But it’s time. I’ll be 30 year old this year, and it’s way past time. So I’m taking this particular life lesson on the chin and trying to move forward and deal. It sucks. It’s even really truly unfair. I spend the entire day yesterday sobbing into my OWN Mom’s shoulder, but the fact of the matter is, that’s life, there’s nothing I can do about it. Except learn a lesson. Know that I can be better next time. And as much I would love for someone to swoop in and save me from this nightmare, I have to be my own hero here. Because I have a beautiful little girl to take care of. And I can’t have her thinking that I don’t know how to take care of all of us, now can I?
So the struggle ends here. I’m rising to the occasion, and I’m grateful to have a husband who understands when I need a hug, and not a judge.
(And Netflix This is My Life. Nora Ephron is a badass.)
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